Let's Talk About This Four Loko (in the voice of your mother)

The news coverage of America’s most disliked new energy drink has reached almost every corner of media and is, at this point, almost unavoidable.

What has not been discussed enough though, and what really interests us here at “The Biz” is the cultural relativism inherent in the American lifestyle that allows a product like Four Loko to be conceived of, produced, funded, tested, approved, marketed and sold to willing consumers before “Watchdog Groups” leap in and start a campaign to destroy it.

Going back in very recent history (and for those you still unfamiliar with “The Loko”) the news of Four Loko’s impending demise seemed to come to light concurrently with a public awareness of its existence.

The energy drink, a product of Phusion Products, a four-year old, Chicago-based company, is an alcoholic beverage that contains malt liquor, giving it 12 percent alcohol by volume to be exact which is more than twice the average amount found in a light beer. The other ingredients are predominantly caffeine, guarana, a fruit from the Amazon that roughly twice as much caffeine as coffee beans, and taurine, an amino acid that accelerates the ability of the human body to synthesize the other three products.

Mmmm, tastes like science.

To mask the taste of the major four ingredients (Four Loko, get it?) the drink is sold in flavors like lemonade, kiwi strawberry and watermelon to name just a few.

Sound delicious yet?

Or at least intriguing?

If you said yes to either, you have a lot of company as Four Loko is never sold for more that $2.50 per can.

If you said no to both, you also have a lot of company as many have alleged that the beverage is dangerous and, in some states, unlawful.

Back in 2008, more than a few states tried to change state laws and make caffeinated alcoholic beverages illegal. The political pressure made a number of companies, like Anheuser Busch (does anyone out there remember “Sparks”?) change the formulas of the malt liquor beverages they produced that contained caffeine.

But Four Loko is a whole new ballgame and its formula makes all its predecessors seem innocuous by comparison.

So much so that there is another tidal wave of legislators throughout the country moving in concert to ban “The Loko” within their state lines.

A good example of the financial and political minefield that this aforementioned wave is creating is the opposition that Phusion and its creation are facing in New York.

Now "The Empire State" is admittedly home-base for “The Biz” but this is genuinely an interesting case as state law forbids the legislature from singling out certain products that have had their genus approved by the Food and Drug Administration.

Now since larger companies, like our old example Anheuser Busch, have worked with states to keep their products on the shelves, a small, newer company like Phusion can’t fight the state alone.

But will frothing intense opponents of Four Loko, like US Senator Chuck Schumer (D-NY) use the nuclear option and support a ban on alcoholic caffeine beverages and risk alienating large, potential donors just to keep a Kiwi-Lemonade flavored abomi booze that keeps you up all night, off of shelves?

So it seems like we’re looking at the old debate of government versus private enterprise, which means it could be a long, tough slog for everyone.

I hope the two sides have the energy and patience to get it figured out in a reasonable amount of time.

If not, can we here at “The Biz” suggest this cool new energy drink?....

Also, here's a little bit of "on topic fun"